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My girls and I at Tif’s wedding 1/20/13 |
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Tresa & Tiffany at Tif’s Graduation from GCSU |
God blessed me with two children, both girls. They were born 8 years apart.They are both married, the youngest was married Jan. 20th of this year. The oldest has been married 15 years and is the mother to all of my grandchildren. She and my hard working son-in-law have 5 children together and share in the joys of his 2 oldest son’s, both grown.
Yesterday, I registered on a parenting website for bloggers and discovered their drop down selections stopped at college age children. Humph! I shot them a quick e-mail, got no response. I didn’t stop becoming a parent when my children passed a certain age. Parenting adult children is still PARENTING.
Parenting simply takes on a new dynamic when your children are grown. Define grown. The state at which your child becomes grown and when mine became grown may not be the exact same age. It is more of a state of mind than a date on the calendar. Adult children tend to seek advice which they genuinely want it as opposed to the challenged parents of teenagers trying to gently force advice and ideals onto our teens. I once saw a bumper sticker that read, “Parents of teens know why animals eat their young”. I thought that was funny. There is hope for parents of teenagers. It really does get better. There will come a day when your child will actually tell you how much they appreciate you trying to keep them alive during their teen years. All parents don’t have teenagers who are solely responsible for all their gray hair but statically in our country, it would seem that most homes do. I’m just saying, it gets better.
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Michelle says
My mom would totally agree with you! She is the mother of 6 children who are all now married or soon-to-be married. She’s just as much of a mom now as she ever was – the role is just different. 🙂 When she was first married she said she wanted 12 children. They stopped after 5, then adopted 1 more. Now that we’re all partnered up she has her 12! And 5 grandchildren to add to that.Children are such a blessing! Hard work, but such a blessing. 🙂
Shirley Wood says
I love the fact that you know what your Mom’s “Mama goals” were and you recognize the hard work it took to get there. Let the good times roll! LOVE those big family holidays on tap for your family!
Shirley Wood says
Thanks, Lorelai. As of right now, they still have not responded.
lifewithlorelai says
I love this! You are so right… parenting never ends. Those children will always be our babies, and we will always want to be there for them, protect them, share in their joys, and help in the hard times. Thanks for pointing this out! I hope you get a response from that mom’s group. I would love to hear what they have to say. 🙂
~Lorelai
Life With Lorelai
Kayla Norman says
I don’t have kids yet but lately I have been thinking about my relationship with my mom and how I would like to be a better “friend” with her and not just a child/mother relationship. I want her to be close and support me like a best friend now that I am an adult and I can imagine that might be hard for her to switch, so I’ve been debating how to bring it up. Any advice?
Shirley Wood says
Kayla, you already are your mothers friend. How often do y’all talk on the phone and about what? (Just reflect, don’t answer here) Is your Mom the person you call first when you have big news? Moms can be their children’s friend but keep in mind, she is an old pro at being your Mom. Moms can’t really turn that off and then just be friends. The “Mom/friend” relationship will continue to grow as the two of you nuture it… and go through your adulthood together. I hope this makes sense to you.
butterflyangelsquilting says
I’m not there yet, but as an adult child, I can see where my Mom is still doing a great job!
Shirley Wood says
What a sweet compliment to your Mom. We tend to learn our parenting skills from those who parent us. Thanks.
Anna says
Thank you so much for this post, soooo encouraging. I too find there is a lot about parenting young children, and very little for adults. Good thoughts there, thank you!
Shirley Wood says
Parenting is a life long position. It really does get better and better as we learn from our life experiences. Thanks for your comment.